Androphobia
by CuttingFirst
Summary: It was that one summer that changed everything. Rate T for a reason


_The air buzzed with the excitement of the festival as everyone was smiling and laughing._

_I was as well. I was wearing a dark blue pleated skirt and layered tank tops. My cute heeled sandals and my hair pulled into a ponytail completed my overall look._

_I smiled as I pulled Hotaru to the takoyaki stand, "Come on! I want to try the takoyaki!" _

_She was wearing khaki shorts and a V-neck purple shirt; her feet were clad in sandals and her hair was put into a small cute bun._

_She scoffed, "You've already tried everything in the festival," she said, rolling her eyes. "I'm going to leave you soon."_

_"Come on," I pouted. "Don't be such a meanie."_

_I let go of her arm to pay for the food but when I turned around she wasn't there._

_"Hotaru?" I asked listlessly at the crowd. She was nowhere in sight. _

_I started walking, looking in all directions for my amethyst eyed friend. After ten minutes of searching, I finally found her by the trees. Relief washed over me as a smile took over my lips. But when I attempted called out to her, I was suddenly jerked into the trees, dropping my half-eaten takoyaki._

_A hand cover my mouth to keep me from screaming while another pair of hands pulled me deeper into the woods. As they dragged me, the cheerful noise of the festival decreased and was overwhelmed by the eerie silence of the forest along with the constant crunching sounds of the leaves. I was abruptly pinned me to the dirty ground. I twisted and squirmed trying to get away from whoever were holding me down but I couldn't, they were too strong._

_At that moment, my entire body was overtaken by fear. My blurred vision cleared and all I could see were the various dirty hands of strangers. The strong odor of alcohol drifted inside my nose, making me feel like gagging. I could feel my tears threatening to come out. I kept jerking my head from side to side to get these disgusting hands off of me. My eyes traveled to my right then to the left, wanting to see who exactly they were; but at the same time I didn't.  
_

_There were so much hands I didn't know how many they were. Feeling a instant sense of bravery, I bit the hand covering my face to scream for help, but something hard flew across my face. My head whipped to the side and I felt my cheek throbbing. Without warning, they stuffed a piece of cloth in my mouth, making me gag even more._

_Cold hands started touching my legs and I felt shivers go down my spine. I started twisting again and they started tugging at my tank tops, my heart pounded in fear and I struggled more. _

_More hands came to hold me down and some went under my clothes. The cold feeling started to grow and I grew more scared. My tears couldn't take the imprisonment that I held them in and came out, practically in waterfalls. I tried to scream some more and tried to put the cloth out with my tongue. My breasts were suddenly touched but skin to skin, I couldn't take this. I finally managed to push the cloth out and screamed._

_"No! Please, please don't! I don't want this, please don't!" I cried and pleaded but they ignored me they kept going. _

_At some point something shiny flashed and then something sharp was pointed against my neck. A low, slurred voice instantly shut me up as I was faced with the face of a man.  
_

_"Shut up."_

* * *

I jerked up screaming, my sheets were twisted around me and my skin felt like it was crawling with spiders. Tears were streaming down my face and I clutched my hair in terror. I could still feel their touches; the _fear_.

I don't know how long I was screaming but soon Hotaru came bursting into my room. My head shakily looked over at her as she looked at me with her worry-filled eyes. She swiftly walked over to my bed and held me in her arms.

"Shh, your safe now shh," she said as she rubbed my back soothingly and continued to murmur gently against my ear.

My screams lowered to whimpers and sobs, she gently pushed my hands away from my head and wiped my tears away but more continues to flow.

I was shaking uncontrollably but Hotaru continued to calm me down. Eventually, my tears stopped. The shaking was more controlled and my whimpers and sobs were gone.

Hotaru led me to my bathroom and turned on the shower for me. She turned towards the door and slowly closed the door behind her, like she was scared I might do something stupid.

I gave her a small smile before the door fully closed and I looked into the mirror to look at the tear streaked girl look back at me.

Her hair was tangled and messy, her pajamas were wrinkled and damp from sweat. But her eyes, her eyes were filled with terror and relief.

The mirror soon clouded over with steam and I looked away, I stripped off the sweat soaked clothes and stepped into the shower. Immediately the hot water blasted onto my back and relaxed my tense muscles, I lifted my head up to shower head and let it push my hair back from my face.

I stood there, letting the water run down me and eventually finally really calmed down. I turned the water off and stepped out, wrapping myself with my robe and stood in front of the steamed over mirror.

I wiped my hand across the surface and the face of the girl before was there again but now her hair was damp and the tears were gone. She looked a lot better and her eyes were calm and dark.

I pressed my hand against the mirror and pressed my forehead again the cool surface. I closed my eyes and sighed, "_Calm down, its been a year. No need to go back there._"

I looked back into the mirror again.

Yes, that girl in there is me. And last summer, I was raped.


End file.
